I know how excited we get when we see our kids coming out from their school. And we want to hug them and ask them all the questions that we can to know how was their day and what did they learn. But when see our kids are not that happy to see us and even sometimes start showing anger or crying, we think that my child is not happy with me. Or may be he had a tough day at school. May be doesn’t like school. May be someone is bullying him. May be are teacher was harsh on him. May be ….. may be…. may be….
And our thoughts go on and on with a hundred may be’s. With the result we bombard our kids with questions. All sorts of questions and this creates confusion.
On the other hand kids coming out of school thinking finally the day is over I will go home and eat/rest as per my will. Oh here is my Mom/Dad I can finally be myself again. Little do they know that their mom/dad are waiting for them with a bunch of questions. This usually triggers kids and hence the tantrum begins.
So what we can do instead and how we can make that after school time happy and less stressful for our kids and for ourselves too.
Here are 3 ways for you that you can try:
- Meet them with a snack
At the end of a school day usually kids are hungry and have low blood sugar. Their brain is not working the way it should. Bringing a snack with you shows your kids that how well you know them. After eating a bit they will feel calm and you will see their brain coming back online. Tantrums are less likely to happen when their 1st basic need is made.
If your kids go by school bus then give them one extra snack for their bus time and tell them that this is bus time snack. So that they should know where to find it and when to eat it.
- Let them talk whenever they are ready
Yeah so instead of bombarding them with a million questions wait for your kids to start a conversation. Once they start talking about their school day you can ask some open ended questions where they talk more and you listen more.
Also when you ask questions try to ask specific ones. For example:
• How was your Math lesson today?
• Did you show your teacher what you were working on yesterday?
• I remember you were worried about your test today. How was that?
• What were you playing with your friends today?
• How were you kind and helpful today?
- Show welcoming gesture.
When you meet your kids at school gate or at your house always welcome them with a hug. And tell them how you missed them and that you have prepared their favourite food today.
Because when kids will feel safe and see your happy face they will open up and will start sharing about their day.
Also make sure if there is any change in their routine for the day, you tell them at least after their lunch is done. So that they have got enough time to settle down hence will show less opposition towards the change.
I hope these 3 points will help you lessen the after school tantrums/meltdowns.